The Other Partner’s Turn

People who commit to a long term relationship at a relatively young age are often those who support each other through college and the beginning of a career. For some couples, the resources they have will only support one of them completing advanced education and beginning a career. They make promises to each other that it will then be their partner’s turn for the same support once their life has been established. There have been couples who have broken up over this issue because the financial or emotional support a person was expecting never materializes.

When it is the other partner’s turn, they should expect that their needs are treated as important. If they were the one who supported their spouse through college or the lean days of beginning a business, their reward should be the same amount of support they gave at the time. There are some partners who believe they have made it well enough to forego this type of accomplishment in their partner, but monetary or career concerns are not at issue. Self-esteem and confidence in a partner are what matters most.

A person who feels their partner does not take their hopes and dreams seriously will begin to wonder why they remain in a relationship, and they might begin to see it as a losing proposition. Helping even a committed partner become successful is often a difficult journey, and finding out the same support will not be available makes them feel used. Ending the relationship is often a step in the direction of self-respect.

The other partner’s turn is important to them because they set aside their own dreams to help, and it should never be treated lightly. It is realistic that not all of the career or financial goals will be accomplished, but struggling as a couple is better than being a successful person alone.